Sunday and back home. I was actually beginning to wonder if Aidan would have forgotten our home and all its familiarities…all our routines, the music, the lights, the sounds…
When we walked in the kitchen door he became very still and he looked around. I was looking for a little glint in his eye but at first I could not find it…then after a minute or two his body language changed. We went around and I showed him all his favorites; his ceiling fan that he has an unhealhty addiction to, his chandelier in the living room with the bright blue crystals that he loves so much. We pulled up all the shades and he seemed to remember that we do that every morning when we come downstairs. Together, we walked up the stairs and he caught a glimpse of his bathroom ceiling with the painted clouds and he jumped. In our bedroom he saw the “Summer Basket Green” ceiling and wiggled again, he sighed as we entered his room – clearly this boy, after 8 days away from home and a 4 hour car ride WITHOUT MAKING A PEEP knew he was home.
We had the chance to help make the new house of a good friend more like home. I promised a few before and afters. I didn’t lie. They will come…They may come tomorrow after I go get my new drivers license…or maybe Tuesday after I go to court for the ticket I got IN FRONT OF MY HOUSE for not having a valid drivers license…or maybe Tuesday after I run a faux finish sample to a hopeful client in Lake in the Hills…or maybe Wednesday after I go north to Antioch to drop off a HUGE bid (pray, pray, pray) for another hopeful client…or maybe Thursday after I hurridly try to finish some drawings for Nic’s special project…my point?
Aidan is 8 months old tomorrow. It’s already February and somehow I managed to piss and busy away January. He is so big. Tonight I sqeezed him so hard I thought he might cry. Because we were out of town he had to sleep in his own bed at night and the little stinker did so well. Last night at 3:30 I grabbed him and brought him into the twin bed in my cousin’s old room – I missed him so much. He snuggled in next to me. So happy to be by his momma but still sound asleep. Tonight he is in the pack and play next to my bed. I will probably end up crawling in there with him.
Aidan is 8 months old tomorrow and all I want to do is be his Momma. I don’t want to run errands, figure bids and after my little hopes were dashed with my latest furniture venture I just want to play with him when he is awake and scrapbook him while he is asleep. Yes, Julee…obsession is really the best way to describe it.
I was considering my Gramma the other day and her youngest boy John. Now a man of forty years. You know, she can’t sqeeze his butt or blow on his tummy. She can’t cuddle with him at night. Yes, she can proudly know a good man and father but those tender days of baby smells and affection that would otherwise be inappropriate…that chapter is closed.
This is it. This is my chapter with Aidan. Someday he will only snuggle with me as I tuck him in. Someday he will kiss me as he leaves home. Someday he will hold ME in HIS arms when I die.
I don’t consider myself a busy person. I have few obligations outside of these four walls and I have set aside this time in my life to be that way on purpose. I am still very much “Ang” and my own person but yes, I am obsessed with my son.
I GET to be his Momma and lately that is all I want to do. Tonight we ain’t watchin no stinkin Superbowl. After a fun week of friends, work and family we are just BEING a family! Who could ask for more? I will take all the over-time I can get.