One morning late last fall I woke up from a horrible nightmare to sound of the phone ringing. In the dream Joel and I had been with my little sister Chelsea (10 years younger) in a hospital and they had lost her. Suddenly we couldn’t find her anywhere. I was running up and down the hallways shouting,
Please know I have permission to share this story…
You have turned for me my mourning
into dancing; you have loosed my
sackcloth and clothed me with
Me (great with child) my sister Chelsea and my brother Nic on her wedding day last June.
Romantically featured in this months Belle Inspiration Magazine. Thank you Mimi for all your help in the launch of Parisienne Farmgirl Magazine!
We finally made our way to reception and a friend of mine was working the counter. We begged her to let us use the intercom system to message Chels. After pleading with her she reluctantly agreed.
“Chelsea, it’s okay honey. We will find you! Chelsea, we are looking for you!” I sobbed. “Don’t be afraid.We will find you!”
I snapped from my nightmare.
And in that instant I knew what had happened.
I grabbed the phone and saw the caller ID bearing her name. I took a deep breath and answered only to hear her sob,
“We lost Baby K last night.”
“I know, honey. I know.”
And we wept together. She had only recently found out she was expecting and she and her hubby were elated. I too lost my first baby to miscarriage and was hopefully able to offer the comfort that only someone who has experienced something so sad can.
Miscarriage makes a women feel so utterly helpless, guilty and empty. My heart ached for her. To this day Joel and I still shed tears over our little one who is in heaven with Jesus.
Weeks and weeks went by and poor Chelsea still felt dreadful. Feeling as though she was loosing her mind… feeling… but not dare saying that she thought she was still pregnant. She waited for the sickness and other symptoms to wear off and they finally did… almost.
Time passed and she thought she had come to be expecting again and so she met with the midwife and then the ultrasound guy came to the house. As he passed the wand over her belly she thought to herself, “Dang, that’s a big baby for 8 weeks along. Arms and legs already???”
You won’t believe this.
She was actually about 14 weeks. It appears as though she miscarried a twin last year! All the crazy notions she was too freaked out to mention out loud weren’t so crazy after all!
When she called to tell me, I could not stop laughing.
Obviously it is still sad, but it’s so wonderful too! The sadness that miscarriage brings is something I believe is not talked about enough… (I am fixing to do so soon). But God in his perfect plan has taken her mourning and turned it into dancing again.
From a wedding last year to a baby this year! It’s gonna be another fun summer!
I love you Chelsea.
You are going to be a wonderful Momma!