The Enexpected Expectant

Cat’s out of the bag.
Here it is…
There are 30 months between numbers 1 and 2
There are 23 months between numbers 2 and 3
There are 20 months between numbers 3 and 4  
There will be 23 months between numbers 4 and 5
1302233204235
Five.
Five.
Five.
Surrounded by boxes, hungry kids and a giant moving truck in the farm driveway… me and a curious trip to the bathroom with a Walgreens bag.  

THE DAY AFTER WE MOVED IN.
I almost fainted.
My world began to spin.
I almost fainted.
Serious.
That’s never happened to me before.
Wait. 
 What about this “Turbo Fire body” I’ve been working so hard on???
Wait?  
What about the weedless garden I was going to have this year?
Wait?  
What about the stress that I am finally getting under control??
Wait?  
What about saving for a trip to Disney World?
Wait!
Wait!
Wait!
Wait?  What about labor?  My heart began to pound at the thought of going thru that again.
It wasn’t that I didn’t want another baby.
In fact, I had shed MANY tears this past year over the thought of being “done”.
Wait.
Love.
Instant.  Glorious.  Love.
It happens so fast.
As the days passed, I acclimated.
I was humbled by God.
This one… this FIFTH was His idea.
Not mine.
Wait?  
You mean I am not in control????   
Now – if you are a longtime reader – you know I am in the throws of horrible all day sickness.
And we are in the same place as the last pregnancy – low, low progesterone and high risk for loss.
So, I am on the cream.  
Exhausted.
Hugging my babies…
and the toilet.
Praying to hold
“P.R. le Cinqieme” sometime this August.
So very unexpected.   

  

FIVE.    

Comments

  1. says

    Congratulations, Angela!! I’m so happy for you and your family, really!! I smiled to myself as I was reading you, it’s a blessing!! I wish I could be soon a mom too (my husband lost his job two years ago…). Lots of love from Spain!!

  2. says

    Dearest Angela,
    I am a very good friend of Cindy Young. I quietly follow you along on your journey. Today I felt the need to speak up. You see, I am a mama to nine here on earth(6 in heaven) and I know we share similar hearts on the wonder of being a mama. I just wanted to encourage you and let you know that you are a good mama! You will make it throught this yucky stage, you know that. But i just wanted to give you a cyber-hug, cause I know it (all of it) can be so hard.

    A note on progesterone, not that you asked ;-) but the cream became no where near enough for me with each pregnancy. By the last baby I was on the maximum dose (pills) my mid-wife had ever prescribed. Just encouraging you to have your numbers checked and don’t be afraid to take bio-identical pills. Those first three months i was completely in a zone on another planet, but the joy of getting to carry the baby all the way through was so worth it.

    Slow down, dear mama, as a very ‘driven’ and ‘gotta get things done’ mama, i know how hard it is to slow down and let things go. AS an older mama who has been through severe adrenal exhaustion, I am just gently encouraging you. Gardens can wait. Organized home can wait. Even school can wait. Take care of you. Be your own best friend. Treat YOU like you treat your babies and your husband. LOVE yourself (and your family) enough to take care of you. I am in no way saying you don’t, just letting you know it is okay!

    Okay, i will go back to being a quiet follower. ;-) May He keep you and bless you and your precious gift!

    Michelle

  3. says

    Congratulations!!! I am so happy for you. It’s been such a joy to see your family grow over the years. You have been such a good reminder to me that time moves by fast. Look at all that you have done in the past years! It’s remarkable. I will be praying for the health of you and the baby.

  4. says

    So Proud of your courage Angela, and your quick adaptation to the Father’s will …
    so a little bit of your glory, will also be ours!
    a new teenie one, to love and adore, and smell the milkie breath and all that goes with …

    p.s. I knew on Christmas Day … before you shed a word

    it’s a mother thang

    love momma

  5. says

    Ah the blessed caboose. Never fear, they are always the darling.

    I say that August 20th is a nice date. Of course that is my birthday. :)

    Here’s to getting over round the clock sickness and just getting round.

  6. says

    Congratulations!!!!!!!! I knew it from your PIN boards yesterday. It all made sense. :-) I can’t imagine how much you must have on your plate right now. How exciting to have a new little one birthed at home to inaugurate your new farm!

    Prayers for a healthy pregnancy and birth!

  7. says

    Congratulations! I am one of five, and having many siblings is glorious. Your beautiful family is going to have another gorgeous member; how blessed you all are! Can’t wait to see this new child growing and then joining the family and the world. Good luck for a misery-free pregnancy and birth!

  8. says

    Your the best mommy ! Clearly the Lord also thinks so as well! I read today’s post with joy and light in my heart! Congrats ,I will a glass of champs in your stead and toast this new blessing!
    Hugs!

  9. says

    That is wonderful!!!! Your kids are so gorgeous and you know how darling I think Amelie is. I was kind of thinking you might be pregnant when you posted about not feeling wel.. Go Leo’s! An August baby!!
    Christy

  10. says

    How exciting Angela. My fourth was a shocker and it is amazing how quickly our fears turn to excitement. We serve an amazing God and this baby was planned by him ! Enjoy this season. It passes so quickly ! Will be praying for favor for you and your family !

  11. says

    Funny how God never worries about “Wait, what about…” and just piles blessings upon us when we least expect it! Congratulations from 1 Mama of 5 (in 7 years) to another!

  12. says

    Oh Angie- oh my. Another beautiful baby for you and yours to cherish. So happy for your little family. Can’t wait to see the farm with another little chubby pair of legs running around!

  13. says

    I am so excited for you! You just look like you’re meant to be a mom to 5!!! I can say I am one of five kids and it is a lot of fun! Praying for safe baby and momma!

  14. says

    ANGELA!!! Wonderful news – overjoyed in fact! Praying for you and Baby #5. Your blessings are overflowing, girl! (Our #3 was a surprise as well, and it took me a week to adjust, but there is nothing better. NOTHING!! – other than Jesus) God WILL mold us to be like Him. Isn’t it so good of Him to use a GIFT to do that! Soak it all in and enjoy this time of life. You’ve heard it a million times because it is TRUE – this season of life will pass all too quickly!

  15. says

    i am so freakin excited for you i am almost crying! there are times i wish we had 5, but alas, 4 it was for us. blessings on you sweet mama. {i did think it curious you pinned maternity sites come to think of it ;)}

  16. says

    Oh my, oh my, oh my…..CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!! So happy for you and I will for sure be praying! The Lord gave you this precious new one and He can surely keep the both of you safe. Much love from my farm to yours!
    xoxo
    Noel

  17. says

    How delightful! God has a plan and HE is in control! Blessed be the name of the Lord!

    Congratulations // beyond the surprise and the china bowl hugging, may you feel his arms holding you and your wee little one!

  18. says

    I know you might feel sick and overwhelmed, but hang in there because you are an awesome and beautiful Momma! And you and you hubby make beautiful children so I am excited for the both of you and hope that you have safe and healthy pregnancy! :)
    Congrats and God bless,
    Michelle

  19. says

    Yay. Psalm 127:3 Lo,children are an heritage of the Lord:and the fruit of the womb is his reward.vs4 As arrow are in the hand of a mighty man;so are children of the youth.vs5 Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them:….Congratulations, you are blesses.

  20. says

    Congratulations and love coming your way. God is good…all the time…God is omniscient, God is omnipresent, God is all powerful. Enjoy the time as much as possible….the sweetness of “one last time”.
    Blessings, Lorraine

  21. says

    Also, if your wanting an easier garden this is what my hubby and I plan on doing with ours and I am sooo excited. Take the time to watch this, so worth it! I also bought the video cause I want to have it and our internet connection is so slow that it wouldn’t load. After watching it I’ll never garden any other way! It’s free to watch here on Vimeo though. Hope you like it as much as we do. http://vimeo.com/28055108

  22. says

    So excited for you, as soonn as I read the title I was shouting. So very special time i your life, enjoy as best you can. If anyone on this earth can handle it with style and grace, it is you.

  23. says

    hi ang, my mom just told me that you have a surprise coming this summer! So happy for you! I just wanted to comment on the low progesterone issue. I can sympathize…I had 5 losses because of low progesterone. Mine was so low that I couldn’t go on the cream. I had to use troches. They dissolve in your mouth and they have to be compounded special. They might be something to look into if your levels don’t stay where they need to be. Giselle VanDerLaan

  24. says

    Hi Ang! My mom just told me that you are expecting a surprise in August! I read your post, and I wanted to comment about the low progesterone issue. My progesterone is also very low, which caused the five miscarriages before we finally had Matthew. Mine was so low that I couldn’t use the cream. I had to use troches, which dissolved in my mouth. They had to be compounded by a special pharmacy. Anyway, I just wanted to let you know about them just in case your progesterone levels are lower than they ought to be during this pregnancy.

    Giselle Young VanDerLaan

  25. says

    What a blessing, Angela! I am sorry about your feeling so awful. I am the baby of five and I love coming from a large family. I only wish I would have met my husband and started my family a bit younger, I’d love to have a couple more. I will be keeping you and le cinquieme in my prayers. I wish I lived closer, I’d come and help you with your “chores”. Please take care of yourself!

  26. says

    Oh Angela, God is so wonderful in His surprises that are always better than anything we could think up ourselves. I’m writing this on my iPhone at 11pm, with my sweet little one month old cuddled up on my chest. After losing four babies, I used progesterone suppositories-which it turns out was the most effective way to absorb the hormone, and carried this blessing to term. 600 mg daily, (200, 3x day). Just keep an eye on those levels and if the cream’s not doing it, ask for something different. Our baby girl was born at home in water on her 3 year old brother’s birthday. I have eight now, four boys and four girls, spanning from ages 27 down to one month. I have five grandchildren and one on the way. I’ll be 47 years old in two weeks. I’ve had all natural births, six at home, two in water. I felt exactly the same way you did when I thought about labor this time. God was with me-I prayed and clung to Him and sang to Him throughout transition. It was powerful and a mercifully good experience. You can trust Him in all things. God bless you and this precious little life!

  27. says

    Congratulations! I actually thought this was what it was when you mentioned being sick that you hadn’t talked about, coupled with the delaying the mag…I was like, “Oh my goodness, she’s pregnant!” So, so excited for you!

  28. says

    Angela!! I knew it ! God whispered in my ear that you were pregnant. 5 is very symbolic- Jesus famous miracle where he fed 5,000 people with 5 loaves and fishes! God has given each of us 5 senses,I could go on. As I read your post I was actually sobbing as you put it so eloquently. I had my own miracle today (not pregnancy) but a huge miracle and reading your post was like a little word from God. Thank you for being so open and real and I wish I could hug you but can you fell the squeezy hug through the screen all the way from Australia. xxCorrina.

  29. says

    Congratulations Angela, Joel, Aidan, Amélie, Juliette, and Julien! What a wonderful blessing for the Lord to give you such a precious “unexpected” gift.

    The Lord knows what delights us, and even though the timing seems so far from reasonable to you, everything is perfectly orchestrated for HIS plan.

    Mandy

  30. says

    From one control freak to another: God’s got this… Just sit back and enjoy the ride. The best times of my entire life so far has been when I am out of control, literally, and God is driving. I said this when we moved to our farm with to live completely off the grid over 4 years ago now when I was newly pregnant as well for number 8 and after 2 miscarriages. The only time the Bible mentions a reward of any kind on this despicable earth is, “The fruit of our womb is His reward”. Just think, God planned this perfectly to reward you when you least expected it. HOW COOL IS THAT! xo

  31. says

    Oh, wow! What wonderful news. I’m so happy for you (and a tad bit envious!). I hope you will feel better and that this baby will make him or herself comfy in your belly and grow big and strong.

    LOVE!

  32. says

    Congratulations…. so so exciting. I’ve got 5 here with me and one up there…….. you can do it!! worth every butt wipe, nose bleed, tear shed, but I know you know that already (or at least most days). Take care of yourself first! Everything else can wait :)
    xoxHeather

  33. says

    Dearest Angela,
    Congrats are in order!!! A baby. May all go really well. Sorry about the morning sickness. No fun, but will pass.

    You are a one of a kind kind of Lady on a custom designed life that God made for you with a good plan for your life.

    You are so young and pretty! You and your husband make beautiful babies!!! Babies are a gift from God. Wish I had had more. Embrace this time in life…it will pass by and you’ll be asking where did it go.

    This is a busy time in life….but it will morph into a new day full of surprises and blessings.

    It will be a delight to watch your children grow and experience country living.

    God bless you,
    d on the kansas prairie

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