10 December 2012

I am Still Here

Unpacking like a manic.
I have SO much I want to share but I have been falling in a heap at night.
I just want to return to blogging so bad.  I miss it.  I miss the creativity behind the posts. 
 I miss the rapport with the readers.

Please pray - I have been have some respiratory problems. 
 It's REALLY slowing me down.

In fact, I am setting my pride aside
 and I will be delaying the January edition of the magazine 
because of that and some other health issues.
It will come out 2.1.13

I hate to do it - but PFM in many, many, many ways, is a one woman show when it comes to actually laying it out and getting the magazine into your hands... ahem... onto your computer screen. 
 Please forgive, but I am only human and life is getting in the way of my scheduled work.

We are in the process of trying to find the source of my symptoms.  
Obviously, we are praying it is not mold... as having to leave this house after everything... emotionally and physically that we have gone through to get here...

I can't even think about it.

But something is going on. 
  I sound like a smoker, my eyes are bloodshot, I am VERY uncomfortable during my much-loved workouts and I have these random coughing fits that are really upsetting my husband.  
We almost went to the ER the other night my breathing was so restricted.

'Family keeps wondering why I didn't notice this before...

I don't know...
The weather has been so nice, I am so warm blooded... we only recently closed up the house and turned on the furnace.  

Praying it's DOG HAIR (you know how much I love dog hair).
  Praying it's not mold.  

I am going to try to throw up a bunch of half -a$$ed posts in the next couple days.  So many of you have been on this journey with me for so long... I wish I could just have you over for coffee, give you a tour of the place...  and thank you for your support.

These breathing problems are an attack on our family.  
Our stress level over the last year has been just about unbearable and we have done our best to protect our children from it but Mom and Dad are human... we snap, we over-react... So, we are here to pull together even closer as a family, learn new skills, chill out more... and savor life.  We are desperately looking forward to Christmas - to relaxing with our children, to hosting a joyous holiday with my extended family.

The stress has GOT to end.
I am putting my foot down.
Enough is enough.

Remember that thing I posted a couple months ago?
"Whatever doesn't kill me had better start running?"

Word.

-Angela, Parisienne Farmgirl


40 comments:

It's me said...

Take good cr of yourself Darling.....i Miss you...hope you ar back soon!......lov from me...Xxx....

betsy said...

My dear Farmgirl- It sounds like asthma and allergies. Have these been ruled out? Asthma can come on at any age. I developed it at 44! Wishing you the best-

Sheree said...

Get well soon.

I just saw The Girl From Paris. Have you seen it?

Sheree

Katy said...

Dear God I hope it's not mold too!!
Just hang in there and take it one moment at a time - remember that even if it IS something that bad, your health is more important than the house and anything can be fixed.

Mandy said...

i am with ya girl. i've been dealing with health stuff for a couple years {yet to be determined} and i am so flippin sick of being exhausted. praying it comes down to a simple solution for you. enjoy your Christmas and don't worry about loosing us, we'll still be here;)

Lady Courtney said...

I'm praying it's not the house! I too got really sick this fall, and it took forever for me to get well, it grew straight into bronchitis, the first time I have ever had it, and had to go to the doctor. Looks like maybe some testing is needed in the house? Take care of yourself, we will gladly wait for the magazine knowing that you are taking care of yourself. :) donna

Splenderosa said...

Ang, just get well before you take on anything else. I don't think it's mold, anyway there are many companies that do mold/mildew abatement and homeowners insurance usually pays for it. We are cold in Houston, the Houston Texans (our NFL team) is playing the New England Patriots tonight in Boston on Monday Night Football. We are 11-1 on the season, the BEST record in the league. Cheer for us. Sending love....

Lisa and Joey @ Paintbrush and Screwdriver said...

So sorry to hear that you're having problems. My husband developed asthma later in life.

Praying that they find out what it is and that it's not mold.

Mary Beth said...

I'm praying for you! As someone who developed lung disease out of the blue a bit over 6 years ago, I understand how unnerving this is. Hopefully it's pet dander or something easy to get rid of. Be careful with yourself! Feel better soon!
Mary Beth

Mourning Dove Farm said...

I recently read an article on mold in a magazine (Cottages and Bungalows Dec. 2010) that I found helpful. It said it is more of a problem in newer rather than old homes. I live in a 110 year old house so I always worried about that. I am not sure how old your house is but I felt much better after reading about mold in that article. I hope they can figure out why you are ill. You amaze me with all you do--I know it is hard with little kids and a new place to live but I am praying you can get extra rest.

vintage girl at heart said...

Hope you feel better soon and that maybe it's just that the duct work needs a good cleaning! Take care of yourself girly!

Faith said...

I'm so sorry you're struggling with health issues. That is awful! I'm praying for you for healing and getting to the bottom of what's causing it, and for peace and calm for all of you. I love you!!!

Faith said...

I'm so sorry to hear you are struggling with these health issues. That is awful!! I am praying for you for healing and that you will be able to get to the bottom of what's going on as well as for Peace for your entire family. I love you!!

Stephanie said...

I hope you feel better soon. Get some rest and enjoy Christmas. Praying for you.

Teri said...

Take a moment and rely on scripture!! No matter how overwhelmed you are, stressed or sick just take a moment and draw your strength from the Lord. Maybe right now this is your thorn in the flesh? A testing period perhaps? Just said a prayer for you and your family and will say one again before bed. Get well I miss your posts throughout my work day!

janet said...

Take care and looking forward to your posts..

Rosemary@villabarnes said...

Take care of yourself, Angela. I developed indoor allergies over the past few years (dust and such). Not fun. Sending a prayer your way.

Shingle Cottage said...

Angela have you tried antihistamines? i have asthma and take medication to control it and part of my treatment is taking antihistamines daily to stop me being allergic to air borne allergens,if i don't take them my eyes water and are red,i cough and can feel exhausted,hope you get it sorted soon it's no fun when you can not breathe x

Sheila said...

Feel better, Ang! Praying that they figure it out quickly and that it's an easy fix. Joyeux Noel a vous et votre famille!

Sheila said...

Feel better, Ang! Praying that they figure it out quickly and that it's an easy fix. Joyeux Noel a vous et votre famille!

WhiteWhispers2u said...

So sorry to hear you are having health issues.I had the same symptoms about ten years ago.

It ended up being mold in the duck work of our heating system.No one else had any symptoms but myself.We had a special company come clean and sanitize the ducks out and I was fine in a few days.Please don't wait Respiratory issues are very dangerous.
You also could be very allergic to your Chickens but I would clean heating vents/ducks first.I will keep you in my Prayers~Blessings Kim

jennifer mori said...

Blessings to you and you darling family! Please feel well soon. Prayers from California …

jennifer m said...

Blessings to you and you darling family! Please feel well soon. Prayers from California …

jennifer m said...

Blessings to you and you darling family! Please feel well soon. Prayers from California …

Francesca Meazza Passionedeco said...

Oh dear,
so sorry to read this.
I am sure it is not the house, it must be all the stress and the apprehension for all it is going on.
Please keep us updated (not on the house which I am sure it is getting wonderful!!).

Praying for you all.

Fra

Rosa Veldkamp said...

The coughing and trouble breathing are what happens to me when my asthma acts up. Luckily there are good medications to help with that. If I was at your house having those issues I would firstcheck the furnace as all kinds of crazy stuff seems to build up in there during the off season. The other thing that would possibly be a problem would be smells/off gassing from all the painting and what have you that you have been working so hard on. They tend to linger when you have to keeps doors and windows closed. Thankfully that doesn't last forever....
I am sending up a prayer for all of you that you find an answer quickly and have a fabulous Christmas season! :D

shirlgirl said...

Stress and tiredness make any small thing worse. I had been told that I had chronic bronchitis and it had gotten bad and frequent. I did learn to slow down some, get more rest and when I did get sick Echinacea Goldenseal helped me get well when the antibiotics did not even get me over it. I have gone for 3 years now without getting sick. Hope you find the cause and cure. Prayers are with you.

Elma said...

OH I pray you feel better soon:(
Take care!!

Vonda said...

I have always said moving is next to death add children and not felling well to the move BUMMER!!!
I will pray for you..Much love, Vonda

Vonda said...

I have always said moving is next to death..add not feeling well and the childrens reaction to a new place,,BUMMER!!! I am praying for you. much love, Vonda

Vonda said...

I have always said moving is next to death especially when you are not feeling well and the children can always since the tension. You are in my prayers. Much love, Vonda

Sue@CountryPleasures said...

You must take care of yourself first the rest will follow!! Praying for you!!

Ggomez said...

Your exhausted girl! We miss you! Look forward to you getting energy back to do what you need,and return to blogging! I am always happy to see your posts in my email,makes me smile :)
Take care

Priscilla said...

I figured something mist be up, when you hadn't posted for a while. Rats. It must be terrible, being sick when you have so much to do.
Please take care of yourself.
As always, I continue to pray for you and your dear family,
Priscilla

Vonda said...

I still say moving is next to death especially if you are not feeling well. Add the children..they sence the stress which makes them act up BUMMER!!!Remember this too will pass and you will love your new home. I am praying for you and your family, Much love Vonda

April Dunlap said...

Praying it's not mold WITH you.
It could also be residual fumes from all the paint, flooring, etc. y'all have been doing.

Hope you ARE better really, really soon!

Wishful Acres Farm said...

Oh boy, so sorry to hear this. We purchased our foreclosure farm almost 2 years ago now. It had been vacant for a few years... and it had some very visible mold in several locations inside. In fact, it was very hard to get a bank to lend on the property as a result. The bank required that we have mold analysis done first, a mold inspection, and then we had to sign on with a licensed mold remover before the bank would let us buy the property.

There was a pretty easy test that was done for mold, the guy charged us less than $100 if I remember correctly. He set up a petri dish in the house (before we bought it), and he was able to collect mold samples... then it was mailed off to a laboratory, which then sent him a report on which types of mold were present. Luckily, our farmhouse mold wasn't the "dangerous" type.

Do you have anyone in the area who can perform this test for you?

Good luck, I know you're renting the house so it's not exactly something you can "fix" yourself... :-(.

Noël McNeil said...

I will most definitely be praying for you! Stress can induce many many symptoms. And just to let you know, we had mold in our home(not current one)a few years ago and we used a hospital grade mold killer(not sure what to call it) and it worked wonders. Seriously, the mold literally vanished once it was sprayed. I am not a fan of chemicals, but since the mold was in my son's room, it had to go bye bye. If you'd like me to try to find out the name of it and where you can get it let me know. Hang in there, the Lord will care for you and help you and your family in this time of trouble. Lord bless!

French Country Gal said...

I know when we moved and remodeled our home, we just got done it took 7 months, stress can do things you never thought could happen, you are that other person and it could bring up health issues that you thought were under control believe me, it happens, hopefully it's just stress and not mold that is causing your breathing problems, I understand what you're dealing with and I don't want to do it again!

Sandi~A Cottage Muse said...

Hoping they find out what is wrong quickly so you can enjoy the holidays. Take care!